Sometimes dead is better, and sequels are worse

In which I marvel at the mania of “Pet Sematary Two,” throw my support behind a new Friend of the Housewives, and cancel “Shipoopi.”

We need to talk about Pet Sematary Two, a horror film that saw a zombie toddler rip out Herman Munster’s throat with his teeth and thought, I can do better than that. That’s not to say that this movie is an improvement on Pet Sematary — a film I think I like more than most — but it’s too relentlessly, admirably batshit to not appreciate on some level. W…